Doors of Perception

The supermarkets seek to save a percentage of their energy costs and pretend that they give a shit about their carbon footprint by putting doors on some of their fridges. They are worried, however, that this might baffle some of their customers, who are apparently used to simply reaching in and hoiking chilled offal straight down their necks. Throbgoblins International suggest the prominent display of instructional diagrams illustrating correct door usage - with helpful pointers towards arse and elbow.

Elswhere Opec tops up its coffers and the UK government actually plans some investment in a more sensible infrastructure, whilst a leading conservation organisation plans to head off the species crunch.